Enneagram at Work

104. Which Enneagram Types Get Along Best at Work? feat. Executive Coach and Former Founder, Nathan Parcells

• Sarah Wallace • Season 4

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What types work best together?

This is a question that comes up during team workshops and while there are no types that work "best" together, it can be helpful to understand the strengths each type can bring to a working relationship, to their team, and to the organization.  It can also be valuable to know what potential challenges you might face working with someone who might share a very different perspective than you. 

In this conversation, Nathan Parcells, former Founder and now Executive Coach and owner at Sharpened Coaching, walks us through three specific co-worker dynamics and what synergies and difficulties each might face:

  • Type 3 and Type 8 
  • Type 8 and Type 9 
  • Type 1 and Type 3 


Regardless of your type, the insights Nathan shares will give you new things to think about when it comes to better understanding yourself and those that you work with.

Today's episode is a clip from the Enneagram MBA podcast library. You can listen to the full conversation with Nathan in episode 82 where you'll also learn about: 

  • Nathan's own startup Founder journey 
  • his biggest tip for getting the most out of applying it
  • what he sees as the most helpful aspects of the Enneagram 
  • his experience having a coach and what to look for when hiring one
  • one thing he's laser-focused on  getting better at as someone with Type 4 energy 
  • helping co-founders manage burnout and when needed, navigate a successful exit 

Connect with Nathan:
Linkedin
Twitter
Website

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Not sure what your Enneagram type is yet, but want to?

🎙️Listen to the episode walking you through how to find your type with 2 questions:
https://www.enneagrammba.com/blog/enneagramtest

💖 Use the power of the Enneagram in your romantic relationship inside The Compatible Couple™ experience with Coach Natalia
https://www.enneagrammba.com/compatiblecouple

✏️ Get an overview of all nine types inside the Understanding People at Work Cheat Sheet 
https://www.enneagrammba.com/cheatsheet

Have a request for a future episode? Drop a text here!

🏆 Begin the process of becoming a Dream Team Certified Workplace: https://www.enneagrammba.com/enneagram-certified-workplace


🗓️ Book an Enneagram Workshop for your team retreat at work:
https://www.enneagrammba.com/enneagram-team-workshops


✏️ Get an overview of all nine types inside the Understanding People at Work Cheat Sheet
https://www.enneagrammba.com/cheatsheet

Speaker 1:

Have you ever wondered what an eagram types work best together? This is a question that sometimes will come up during workshops, that'll do sometimes on podcast interviews, and so I thought let's get into this in a little bit more detail in this week's episode And to help us do this, i'm actually going to pull a clip from an episode in our podcast library. Today you're going to hear a clip that I did with Nathan Parcells. He is a former founder turned executive coach, who now really specializes in co-founder communication, and the Enneagram is one of many tools on his tool belt that he works with his clients on. But this episode was a full episode episode 82, by the way, if you want to listen to the full version.

Speaker 1:

We get into executive coaching, what it is, what it isn't. He identifies as a type four, so we also talk about what you know. A type four leader looks like things that we might get wrong about our type four co-worker. So the whole interview is very interesting and helpful and insightful. But this clip that you're going to hear today really zooms in on the conversation we had with specific type matchups And he's obviously with his work. We use the word co-founder, however you can replace it with co -worker, and it's still going to be just as relevant and interesting. Even if you don't identify with either of the matchups, maybe you'll learn something about people that you're leading, people that you're working next to. And so we look at three specific matchups in this clip the type three and the type eight working dynamic. We also look at the type eight and the type nine working dynamic, and then you're going to hear about the type one and type three, and with each pairing we look at what are some synergies, what are the strengths of this relationship that can benefit each other, that can benefit the team, benefit the organization, and then what are some maybe some common roadblocks that come up based on what we know about the. you know this kind of the stereotypical behavior and what motivates each of the different types, and so feel free to share this one. It's a short clip, so this could be a good episode to share with your coworkers, with your manager, with anyone that you think might be helped by this episode. So, looking forward to having you listen to this one today And if there are additional pairings that you would like to hear about in a future episode, reach out over on LinkedIn. I'm Sarah Wallace, or any agreement BA over there and any agreement BA over on Instagram and send me a message and let me know what pairings might be helpful to dig into a little bit more on a future episode. So with that, enjoy this conversation with Nathan Parcells.

Speaker 1:

You're listening to the Enneagram MBA podcast, a show about understanding people at work, including yourself. I'm your host, sarah Wallace, and I'm looking forward to diving into this week's episode with you. So you have worked with all kinds of different founders and we have talked, as we were kind of preparing for this conversation, about some different dynamics that, again, not all, not always 100% of the time, but maybe have some tendencies based on some common challenges, based on the type, and one of those matchups was the type eight and the type three, which, in the work that I do as well, tend to be some of the most common types in the corporate leadership roles. So it's no surprise that you would have a type three and type eight co-founding pair. What are some strengths, maybe, of that dynamic And then maybe what are some possible challenges that they might encounter?

Speaker 2:

Yeah, absolutely Yeah, eight, three, sevens ones all tend to show up a bunch, but I have worked with founders and CEOs of pretty much all types And the eight and the three is an interesting dynamic I think.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, it's so insightful. I mean I love getting to get part of the secret of being a coach is you learn so much about different relationships and different people on yourself. And eight, being a challenger type and being highly direct and comfortable just saying most specifically and objectively oftentimes here's my thought there tend to be just being a gut-based type, tend to put things forward very quickly, threes being oftentimes both active and extroverted and communicative, but also more aware of being liked and their dynamics with others. Sometimes eight can be pushing a lot and then as a three, that challenging back, to push back, is a little bit uncomfortable because there's that for many a fear of not being liked. Oftentimes I'll see that struggle of getting that muscle built on the three side of how to push back. Sometimes it takes time because what might be uncomfortable for the three is not very uncomfortable for the eight.

Speaker 2:

It takes that timeline and work to build the muscle up such that there's some parity there and that there's healthy boundaries being set between the two.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, i can absolutely see that. I'm curious too. The stereotype for them both, along with the sevens being in that assertive stance, is that they're very future focused, going far, going fast, which I could see being a tremendous quality in that leadership entrepreneur space. But what might be missing that they will have to intentionally incorporate into a dynamic or a duo like that.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, i think something that can happen under stress, that active side can be challenging. I mean all partnerships under stress. You have to be hopefully have done a lot of work in advance so that you can handle those stressful moments And, when more negative patterns of each type comes out, having the capacity to understand and take those in. But with the three under stress, oftentimes sort of fearing failure and starting to become a little bit more overwhelmed is something that can happen. And eights well, oftentimes the eight leaders I work with oftentimes will sort of be doing more driving and micromanaging and controlling And so that can really just add to the overwhelm. So that dynamic is one that could be hard because you don't have anyone who's really there to say let's pause, let's reflect, let's make a plan. And that's sort of what the three leader most often needs is kind of getting back to a place of a plan.

Speaker 1:

Such great insight. OK, let's take the eight again and then pair it with one of on the surface can look like the complete opposite. and the nine? What do you like? What is that dynamic like in your experience?

Speaker 2:

Yeah, this is a duo. You know I've worked with for a while now and it was a really interesting combination because, as you mentioned, there's in some ways quite different in body, energy and sort of how one shows up and, yeah, nines, you know. Again, i'm generalizing here- right folks know.

Speaker 2:

But there's a sort of what an arms distance Approach. How do I Not over commit to too much so that that piece making Or peace seeking side can be satisfied, not wanting to let too much in compartmentalizing sort of guarding against too much coming their way at once. And the eight sort of liking, movement, action, activity, and so that push, pull almost Is something that can show up which could be triggering for both. You know, the eight feeling, the eight leader being like I want to go, i want to move, i want to do, and the nine being like I want to Manage how much comes in at once, and so it's an interesting Combo that can operate in that way.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, yeah. And as, at the same time, that I can see that being like such a great pairing when they both have that level of awareness, because it's like Let's go with the eight, but then like let's pause, let's see, let's look at this situation from all the side.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, it's, it really is, i think, in the co-founder setting, so much about awareness, because it's first the individual awareness and then Being able to like, save those things succinctly to the group where you can have those aha moments of oh that's why we do this Sometimes fall into this pattern that is upsetting or frustrating, and there's, yeah, this duo that I work with had some breakthroughs in that manner where I was realizing Their differences in how they each like to communicate and then finding some behavior shifts, sometimes just small ones of like, oh, if I, as a nine sort of, and to Trying to kind of say too many different things or to Not direct enough, like, hey, if you want, maybe we could do this or maybe we could do that, and you know They eight leader being like this is really what do you want?

Speaker 2:

very frustrating and just a little shift of like Here's what I think, what do you think, and sort of be more comfortable with that from the nine? huge, you know it doesn't fix everything, but it does make up really big. Yeah, sort of dialing down the temperature in those, those key moments.

Speaker 1:

Such a great way to say that. Yeah, people are always one of the questions, like after like, how do I find my type is, how do I use This information, and I mean there's so many examples, but that's just a great run right there. Just a little ships can like. How much frustration and miscommunication can Go away when you understand that about yourself and whoever it is that you're working with.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, i mean also just in terms of how to use it. You know, i think it is quite difficult without great coaching and support to be quite as Proactive as one might like, because so much of it comes down to those taking the complexity of that awareness of oh, i Do prefer peace, i do prefer than not having too much show up at once. But knowing all that and knowing how to manage the discomfort, then Choosing to say something more direct which a nine might fear will create lack of peace, but In actuality something that their co-founder recommended, hey, i prefer this. So it takes a little bit of that Someone to observe and help highlight that option. I think Certainly you can learn those tactics On one's own, but in like, especially in a partnership, it's much harder, because there's so many more dynamics at play, to really see it all and make those shifts.

Speaker 1:

Okay, last kind of matchup that we had talked about going through was the type one and type three, which for me, tends to be one that sometimes people struggle with, like am I a three or am I a one?

Speaker 2:

So there are a lot of similarities here totally and Yeah, that is an interesting thank you for noting that an interesting element that there's similarities in Sort of a performance orientation doing things either right or well, successfully and Yet that I found that this is definitely a combo that can have a lot of tension.

Speaker 2:

You know, obviously all types can get along very well if they're operating at higher levels of consciousness and aware of their patterns and doing all those things.

Speaker 2:

But I worked with one pair where this was a very challenging dynamic because the three being more, you know, willing to do what it takes to succeed and therefore open to efficient approaches and corner cutting in some cases, as they say in the startup world, 80, 20 different projects, so doing just the 80% of the work needed to kind of get the highest impact. Whereas the one very much was and And in this case the three was very much like, okay, what is the customer need? I want to close the sale, so like just doing only what's necessary was the one was like, okay, i have this project timeline that I've mapped out that's really perfect and We need to hit these dates, and then, if something changed, was very frustrating Because they had spent a lot of energy Crafting a clear, right, perfect timeline and so those differences becoming aware of them and why they're there were helped, but it was still a very challenging dynamic for each of them to To deal with.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, and then how, how difficult Was it? maybe in that specific situation, or, or I guess, what was the aha maybe for them that came out of like, oh, this person wants to always do it, perfect, and this person is okay. I'm okay with cutting corners like how do we compromise or what came from that one, just as an example.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, i mean, you know, sometimes it's easy, i know always to go to solutions and so sometimes there are those Behaviorships, as I was talking about in the other dynamic, that were helpful for them. But again, i always do go back to the starting with awareness and I think as they understood each other's perspectives more and really got what was creating the behaviors, like you know, if the three want to change the plan a bit to do what they intubally knew the customer Would like and therefore would be good for sales, but if that was annoying for the one, but just that awareness of oh, this is how this person operates, actually helpful in these ways, i think, allowed it to be less painful. So that was kind of the aha, was just getting that real clear understanding of their differences.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, and I love what you said less painful because I always like to remind myself as well in my own Instagram journey and then others, that this doesn't mean you'll never have conflict again. It just means like maybe it'll be like less painful conflict or it'll last shorter, for sure.

Speaker 2:

A lot of times, so nice to do that Yes.

Speaker 1:

Well, for anyone who is interested in the workshops learning about your co-founder coaching following along with your content, where is the best place to connect with you and learn from you?

Speaker 2:

Yeah, in terms of just connecting with me on LinkedIn is a place that I'm active and just kind of share updates, some Nathan parcels on LinkedIn. If people want to email me with any questions, if they're a co-founder or a creator and want to do some of that work, feel free to reach out my website, sharpendco. And then, lastly, the retreats. They're usually Bay Area based and Protean You can spell that, then you're there. Proteangroup is the name of the website, or just email me and I'll share it with you.

Speaker 1:

Okay, and then Nathan's last name is parcels P-A-R-C-E-L-L-S, so just thank you.

Speaker 2:

Yes, nailed it.

Speaker 1:

Clarify that. Well, nathan, this has been a really good conversation. I feel like I still have so many more questions, just about any Graham type four, So we'll call this episode complete for the time being. I appreciate all that you shared. Please get connected with Nathan. Let him know what you're taking away from this episode. He shared so many things, especially if you are a co-founder or thinking about co-founding up, like you said, a podcast, a business, whatever it might be. Is there anything else that you would like to share about self-awareness, leadership, co-founding? type four, energy.

Speaker 2:

before we do call this episode complete, One little one that I'll just kick off with that is that to make. When you find areas that you're really working on, to set them as six to 12 month, you know improvement areas, don't feel that pressure to. Oh, if I'm trying to learn to be more direct in my communication and that's hard for you, you know life is long And so if you make incremental improvements over the course of six to 12 months, you'll get that inflection that comes from doing that work, and so I think having that length of time can sometimes be helpful, because sometimes we think we need to change XYZ right away. So that's one that I've learned to be quite helpful for my own work, so it doesn't feel so pressure like such a pressure cooker.

Speaker 1:

Yes, that is such a powerful reminder, or just perspective as you grow and incorporate the Enneagram, whatever self-awareness tools that you're using that it is not overnight. It was, we would just all just be reading books and just be perfect the next day. So that's such a great way to end. Nathan, i appreciate you. I'm so glad that we got connected and I'm excited for our listeners to hear this one as well and learn from you as well.

Speaker 2:

Thank you so much And thank you for hosting me. I've enjoyed your questions, your seven energy and this whole process and all the work that you do, so really appreciating that. So thank you, sarah.

Speaker 1:

You are so welcome. It was a fun one. Thanks, nathan. When I'm not planning for the next episode or getting to interview the next podcast guest, i'm probably out doing an Enneagram team training or a group workshop experience, because, while Enneagram MBA is a podcast, it is also a team training company, which means, whether you have a team of four or 40 or are planning an event for 400 people, there is an experience that is waiting to be created just for you and your team or organization or event, and I'm going to invite you to start that process over at Enneagram MBA dot com, where you'll be able to check out some of the initial ideas and options and then reach out to get in touch to start planning your own.